On living well and working hard.

I've blogged before about my constant need to be doing something, even if that something is having a conversation. Either my brain needs to be engaged, or my body needs to be employed in physical labor, otherwise I feel as though I will quickly go stir-crazy. This is why I rarely veg out in front of the TV (or even contemplate vegging out at all for that matter).

Even with this propensity for industry and exercise of my mental capabilities, sometime around a year ago, I felt an urge to be wiser with how I spent my time and energy doing. I seemed to continually end up doing my homework at the last minute, and it stressed me out. I made a concerted effort to make my homework even more of a priority than it had been (which explains why my room has largely been a disaster area for over a year, I told myself that in the face of writing papers and reading novels cleaning wasn't as important as I had normally held it to be). And I've done much better. I even began last semester doing extra homework, if you can imagine.

Despite these strides in the right direction, though, I have recently felt convicted about how I'm spending my time, how I'm living, what I'm doing with my life. Not just, "hey, you know I could probably be spending my time more wisely, so it might be good to think about that," but a really strong, Holy Spirit, "Hey, I'm trying to get your attention," kind of thing.

Not only have I felt like I can continue to improve in what I'm doing with my time, but also with the attention, care, and effort I put into whatever it is I happen to be doing. If I'm going to be doing something, I need to do it well. No halfway. To not really try is barely better than not trying at all, sometimes even worse in certain circumstances, and I don't need to be doing it.

This brings me to my intro to music class this semester. The word "easy" isn't a simple enough word to describe it, I don't think. I'm not sure what the appropriate word to describe it is. So I'll try many words.

When class is in session, I'm one of the only people who calls out answers to general answers he asks. For those who know how I usually am in a classroom setting, this is very telling. Also, I know just about every answer to all the general questions he asks. I seriously feel like Hermione Granger, except I'm not bouncing in my seat and shooting my hand up in the air so much. The standards of the assignments are unbelievably low. We had our first test this week. The extent of my studying was to casually read over the notes I took right before class, and I probably could have still made an A having not done that. There's been nothing to challenge me. The class is structured so that 1000 total points are needed over the course of the semester to get an A. On the syllabus, there are a possible 1300 points listed, and he's already been generously giving extra ones on top of what's listed, so I'm rather confident I'll have 1000 points rather quickly.

I guess this is what I get for taking a gen ed class during my last semester, particularly this one having been a music major/minor.

It's a struggle to engage in this class. There is little desire to try. We've had a few short essays we've had to write, and I'm pretty sure I could have just thrown something well below my ability up on the page, and have gotten full credit. And I almost did. It would be easier. I could get it done a little faster and move on to something else. I could elect to not read the textbook or listen to any of the songs outside of class, and I'm sure I'd probably still pass all the tests.

But that wouldn't be my best. It would be a shabby representation of who I am and what I can do, what value I place on the work given to me. I'm just three months from graduating. I should work like it. In just three months I'll have an English degree. I should write like it.

And so I shall go to class. And do all of my homework. Well. It'll be worth it.